If you put a lemon under your pillow at night, you’ll have sweet dreams. Last night I dreamt of the lemon grove again. Do bees pollinate lemons? At sixteen I was enamoured of Lawrence Durrell’s Bitter Lemons. My first boyfriend drank bitter lemon with vodka. A secret recipe to repel vampires, he said. I was always very gullible. A lemon is a sex story. There are vascular elements in the juice vesicles of the lemon. Did you know there are half vampires with lemon-scented skin?

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